Why You Should Stop Living Other People’s Lives
Take a moment and think about your friends, acquaintances, relatives or family members, are they world-class in what they do?
Chances are most of them are at most good or great at what they do but not world-class or internationally recognized for their work.
I’m not saying that there is something wrong with them. What I am saying is that most people are not achieving world-class results due to one terrifying reason:
THE DESIRE TO FIT IN
Being world-class in what you do would also mean that you will not be able to fit in to the crowd anymore. You will draw haters and naysayers and most people can’t even handle that.
So most people would rather downplay their own potential just so that they can fit in to their group of friends.
I believe that this is not you especially if you are reading this article.
I used to hang out with friends who would rather party or have fun the whole day than to do things like attend success seminars and read books. To them, being serious about work means that you will be the weirdo among them. I had 2 choices, to pursue my dreams or to continue having fun with them so that I can fit in.
I chose to pursue my dreams. It was hard because all of a sudden I lost a ton of friends. They avoided me because I wasn’t just like them anymore.
It was tough. But the good news is, I’ve also attracted people who are just as committed to their dreams into my life.
The point is, most of us tend to stick to our old group of friends even though we know deep down inside what is best for us.
To most people, the pain of not fitting in is so much worth taking than the pain of not achieving their dreams.
That is why most people would rather play safe just so that they can remain cool among their old group of friends.
They would even change themselves so that they can fit in to the crowd and conform.
I get bored even thinking about them. What is so exciting about being part of the crowd of mediocre people who lead mediocre lives?
I know what you are thinking. That you shouldn’t be selfish and should be liberal enough to accept everybody as your friend.
I don’t mean to block them in Facebook or tell them to get off your face.
But what I’m saying is that you are better off spending less time with them and devoting more energy to those whose values are aligned with yours.
If you study all the world-class performers, do you think that they will ever care about what their high school friends or what society thinks of them? Not a second.
This means that you are not going to let your gender, age, background, circumstances or sexual orientation define what you do or what you should not do.
We live in a world that puts people into boxes. A world that is black and white.
We live in a world where people are categorized, labelled and classified.
That is why we have so much arguments and bigotry in this world. People can’t accept people who aren’t in the same category as them.
And I can assure you. Fitting in to those so called norms will not make you any happier.
In fact, it will make you extremely miserable because you are living your life pretending to be somebody that you are not just so that you can be normal.
Believe me, I’ve lived those days where I pretended so much that I’ve forgotten who I am.
If you want to realize your true potential, you have to put down the mask that you have been wearing for so many years.
You are going to be your full authentic self regardless of what society think that you should or shouldn’t do.
If the world-class performers were so concerned about the opinion of others, they wouldn’t be world-class in their field today. We wouldn’t even be talking about them now. And I wouldn’t have enough examples to make my point in this article.
Take this quote from Robin Sharma, “You can either fit in or change the world, but you can’t do both”.
What is your decision going to be?